Anotha One (for '26)

        Welcome back to me sharing my journey as an ESRD patient (End-Stage Renal Disease) aka the last stage of Chronic Kidney Disease. It's like getting to the boss of the disease, but like, way more depressing because he keeps throwing red turtle shells at you, and you know those bitches are always on target. 

    When we last left off, it was toward the end of April, and I was nearly two months into my aortic dissection heart surgery recovery. I was slowly getting stronger, though still relying on my walker to get around the house and around stores when running errands. I'd venture out on walks without it when feeling brave, but I always had someone with me, just in case. My chest was still very much sore and in pain at times, and it was difficult to lift anything heavier than 5 pounds without a wince out loud of pain. However, I had come a long way from needing help getting on and off a toilet while in the hospital. Talk about a humbling experience. 

I was scheduled to return to work on April 23rd and was looking forward to it. There are only so many walks to go on and so many shows to binge and relax to. I missed being out in the community, I missed the leadership program, and I missed working with my team.   

    On the evening of Sunday, April 12th, as I got ready for bed, I felt a sharp pain in my left hamstring.I reached back and felt a tennis ball-sized lump. The pain was very similar to the pain I felt for my blood clot in January of '26. I thought to myself, "Not again," as I drove myself to the emergency room at 11 p.m. Once I finally got seen at around 1:30 a.m., they confirmed the knot in my hamstring was a non-bleeding hematoma. Their only solution: pain management and compression. The pain meds would work temporarily, of course, so I was a bit frustrated with the recommendation. Since I was admitted so late that night/early morning, I had to stay at least an extra day to receive dialysis at the hospital. Because I was still in a lot of pain, they admitted me for observation. The following Saturday, I was getting antsy to get home. Sunday morning, I woke feeling groggy, and my left eyelid was a bit swollen. By the end of the day, it was essentially swollen shut. That night, I was severely itchy, especially on my arms and forearms. I didn't think anything of it, as itchiness is a symptom of CKD. By the next morning, my eyelid was all the way swollen, and blisters had appeared where I had scratched. 

Now, I was in more pain, feeling miserable, and my tongue had swollen to the point where I could barely speak. My left hand had swollen up to the point where I couldn't move it without sharp pain, causing me to cry out. My right index finger and thumb each had blood blisters develop on the joints, and I had weird lacerations show up on my forehead and near my eyes. All of this was topped off with a fat, swollen lip accompanied by its own laceration. Below are some pics I took of myself. 

*GRAPHIC-ISH PICS*

Not pleasant.

Not a great time.

The doctors immediately involved the dermatology team for assistance. They put me on antibiotics and steroids to try to heal the damage already done. The dermatology team came in and took skin biopsies to further study what was going on. All the while, my leg is still ACE bandage-wrapped while I'm dealing with this new pain. I looked at felt terrible. I didn't tell many people I was in the hospital again because I was embarrassed by how I looked. The dermatology team was extremely helpful, but also very honest in initially telling me they were not sure what was wrong. After a few days, the labs showed I had developed Drug-Induced Lupus, vasculitis, and Sweet's Syndrome. The culprit? One of my blood pressure meds called Hydralazine. I had been taking Hydralazine for a few years, only stopping for a short amount of time late last year, but resuming it in 2026. Apparently, this was my body's autoimmune response to trauma. Since it's been through a shit-ton of trauma this year, it's hard to pinpoint what really set it off, but the hematoma in the hamstring certainly didn't help. 

My story had become so popular among the nurses that they would come check on me from different assigned pods to see how I was doing and to check the progress of healing. The lead dermatologist asked me to be a part of her YouTube series of rare skin infections, and I agreed. If my experience could help others, I was happy to share. Though I hate to have to continue to make visits there, the nursing and care staff continue to be amazing at Banner University. They provided encouragement and support, compassion, and care with no judgment. Shout out to Vicki, who was one of my nurses who really helped me get through some difficult nights. 

After an extra week and a half in the hospital, I finally got out on Cinco de Mayo. I celebrated the holiday by collapsing on my couch, nursing a limp from my leg being wrapped for nearly 10 days.  I was so frustrated - my return to work was delayed, and I had pretty much run out of short-term disability payments. I felt weak and had to re-work to regain my leg strength. In fact, I had to use my walker again for a few days. Thanks to some physical therapy from Banner's Home Care system (shout out Dustin!), I was able to regain my strength in my legs (though still a work in progress). I finally made my return to work, six weeks later than planned. And thanks to some much-needed therapy, I was able to vent and let out some feels - thank you, Marissa! 

I'd love to tell you that life has been peachy-keen since this stint, but I ended up going BACK to my second home, aka the hospital, later in July. That's a story for another time. 

Today, I'm back at work and it's been a great distraction. We're making a difference in our communities and I'm excited for what is to come. I've been spending time with family, friends, and loved ones and I'm so grateful. THANK YOU to all of you for following along, checking in on me, lighting candles, donating to the GoFundMe, and praying for me. I'm incredibly blessed, and I'm going to continue to fight. Your kind words, well-wishes, and check-in's keep me more motivated than ever. Our healthcare system is intentionally hard to navigate and can be very frustrating to deal with. I appreciate those of you who have encouraged me to advocate for myself - it's so important! I encourage you all to get your check-up's and ask allllll the questions! If something doesn't sound right or the caregiver doesn't seem to be listening, make sure you do what you are able to be heard. 

With the multiple admissions to the hospital this year, I am absolutely still accepting donations to help with these new bills incurred. There's no obligation to give to the GoFundMe link (you can scroll the tip/fee button to zero to avoid paying extra), but a share goes a long way! I also have Venmo (@matty1786) to avoid any fees. Again, no obligation; I'm just honored you're along for the journey. 

My next meeting with the transplant team is in October. Hopefully, I'll have some good news for ya'll. Thank you again, and God Bless!